Hair today...gone tomorrow

About two weeks ago, I noticed that my hair was beginning to come out more readily. I anticipated this, and was a bit relieved that it had finally started. It wasn't coming out a lot, but if I pulled on it, it usually came out without much resistance. About a week later, I noticed that it was beginning to come out even more. I wasn't sure how long I could stand it, all those loose hairs floating around. Anyone who knows me knows that I am NOT a fan of loose hair! It still wasn't just *falling* out, but each time I put my hand in my hair, I'd come out with a few strands. But the more it came out, the more I knew it needed to go. Washing it was beginning to be fun, too - I just knew I'd better stock up on Liquid Dran-o!

So, after a few (ok, a lot of) tears and a lot of thinking, I decided it was time. No more waiting, no more anticipating - I was going to let my hair go. I sent a text to my sweet hair wizard to ask her when I might be able to come in to see her; I already had my "bought hair," and wanted her to fix it just right for me before I wore it. Once I got a time, my decision was easy. So last Friday night after dinner, Sarge & I set up shop on the back porch. With my Sunshine at my side, holding my hand like the sweetheart that she is, Sarge whispered, "I love you" and shaved off my increasingly wispy hair. My hair has always been pretty thick, so even though it was thinning there was still plenty - and Sarge was so nice to point out the amount of grey in the piles that fell to the porch. I love that man for his sense of humor.

Although it was bittersweet, it was surprisingly liberating. I didn't mind it like I thought I might. I honestly haven't missed washing it or fixing it (yet!). My wig is so close to my usual style & color that most people wouldn't know it wasn't my real hair. I've invested in a few cute scarves, and I'm sure I'll have a few new hats before the summer. Part of me thinks it might even be better to go without anything. Everyone who knows me knows I don't have any hair anymore, so it almost feels like lying when I cover it up! I'm sure I will get there (especially when the summer heat blazes), but I'm digging the new styles I can try right now, so I'll save bald for later ;)

The kids were pretty cool with the whole thing. The boys being boys, they didn't have much to say except a quick grin & thumbs up! Sunshine was a bit more vocal about it, though. We'd been talking about it & I had shown her the wig and how my hair was coming out. She was pretty excited about watching Sarge shave my head! On Saturday, after my appointment with my hair girl, I wore the wig for a while. Before long, Sunshine told me I needed to take off my hair - that she liked me better with no hair! She said the scarves were pretty, but she just liked me with no hair. I guess that settles it. :)

As for the rest of me, I'm not doing too bad. There are days that are worse than others, but overall, it's really not been too bad yet. I don't have a ton of energy most days, and my appetite isn't that great. My neutrophil count is low right now (and probably will remain low), so I'm supposed to be avoiding everyone's cooties. That's easier said than done, but I'm trying. As long as my kids don't bring home any, I think we'll be fine!

Thank you SO MUCH for your continued prayers and love - you have no idea how much it all means to us right now! I will never be able to express our gratitude for the overflow of grace we have been shown!